I'm pretty sure Romney is playing it carefully. He's got to be fully aware that Christians hate him for being in some sort of Jesusy cult with golden tableware or something, so he's kinda sitting back, drinking noncaffeinated beverages, and waiting for the rest of Romper Room (look it up babies) to implode around him. Then he'll still have most of his campaign money left, and he comes out of the primary mostly intact. The problem is that Mittens has put in a bit too much effort into appealing to the batshit groups with garbage like this:
"We have to cut back on the scale of the federal government," Romney declared. "And for me that will start by reducing federal employees by 10 percent. You do that through attrition."
"And then something else that is just as important, and that's to make sure the people who work for government don't get better pay and better benefits than people that work in the private sector."
"The taxpayers shouldn't have to have money taken out of their pay checks to pay people in government who are our servants who are making a lot more money than we are."
1.) Uh, way to get rid of a couple thousand jobs when we need more jobs, fucko!
2.) Pretty sure government work nearly always pays less than equivalent work at a large corporation
3.) What? Isn't that what taxes are for?
Here is a very fair and unbiased breakdown of the Republican field:
- Bachmann: Batshit, and her husband would make an awful first lady.
- Perry: Sorry Texas, we already tried one of your governors, and look how that turned out. You can keep this one. Nice hair though.
- Santorum: Google his name. Look at anything he did while in Congress and then have a good laugh.
- Gingrich: You were a stupid dick in the 90s, you're an even bigger dick now. And your wife is made of plastic. Oh, and Fuck You.
- Cain: Bye! Too much groping of unreceptive women.
- Paul: Americans like a little Libertarianism, but holy shit, man.
- Huntsman: What, a Republican with an IQ over 56? I don't believe it. Apparently Mormons aren't regarded as Christians. Huntsman is probably the best candidate they have if you enjoy having paved roads and running water, you elitist pricks.
- Romney: Looks waffley and weak to GOP Christians. See above for the Mormon thing. Will probably get the nomination due to sheer persistence, or maybe he'll get the nod so we can finally be rid of him when President Obama smashes his face in next year.
EDIT: FIXED TYPO